Hit Men
by PhookaUpsidedown
Summary: They worked for the Volturi Crime Family. They were their best hit men. They were ruthless killers. They were Felix and Demetri. Rated for violence and swearing. Will probably become slashy later.
1. Chapter 1

Demetri prided himself on his knife-fighting. Knives, broken bottles, anything with a sharp edge, and he could do some serious damage. The short Italian was a ninja, with a black belt in most forms of martial arts, and pure black clothes. The short brown-haired man was basically the opposite of his partner.

Felix liked guns. Pistols, shotguns, if there was a trigger, you were doomed. He was a street fighter, no real training needed because he had been fighting all of his life. With a tall stature and raven black hair to match his clothes, Demetri's partner was a frightening sight.

They were hit-men for the Volturi family, partners in crime, best friends. Of course, there were others, like Santiago and Heidi, but none were as good as Felix and Demetri. Once they were on a mission, they couldn't be stopped.

And now their mission was taking out 'Alistair'.

"He owes us...how much, Demetri?" asked Felix as the two walked casually down a dark back street along the river.

"Too much," said Demetri, in his nice, British-sounding voice. "Aro said around a million, I think."

Felix's eyebrows shot up. "Really?"

"No. But he hasn't been paying for something so it really doesn't matter," said Demetri, pulling his switchblade from his pocket.

Felix snickered a bit. He had to admit that Demetri was pretty scary sometimes, but he was a fucking ninja, so he wasn't going to say anything. He was checking his gun when Demetri came to a full-out stop.

"Why're we stopping?" he asked, pistol leaping out of his pocket.

"Sh," hissed Demetri, frowning.

Demetri listened intently before grabbing Felix's gun arm and pointing it at a window above.

"He lives there. He noticed us and will be coming into the lobby soon. Come on."

The two hit-men made their way into the apartment lobby, Felix standing near the doorway as Demetri crouched down in the shadows near an empty reception desk. The two waited for less than a minute when a disheveled man came running down the stairs.

"Hi," greeted Felix pleasantly, beckoning the older man over.

"Who are you?" questioned Alistair, eyes darting around as he took a few steps towards the young giant.

"I'm Felix," he said with a grin as Demetri crept out from the shadows and stood up when he was only half a step behind his target.

"And I'm Demetri," the short man said with a pleasant sort of ring, like he was addressing a child.

Alistair jumped, spinning to face the newcomer. Demetri gave a slight grin.

"Alright, Alistair, three options for you," Demetri said, keeping his pleasant tone. "Money," he stuck out his pinky finger, "gun," ring finger and a nod at Felix, "or knife."

Felix's smile grew as he tilted his head and showed off his pistol. Demetri did the same with his knife.

"G'head and choose," said Felix.

"I-I don't have your money, but I can-"

Demetri lunged forward, driving his knife through Alistair's stomach. "Wrong answer. Felix?"

Once Alistair was on the ground, Felix yawned and shot at his limp body.

"Go throw him in the river," commanded Demetri. "I'm going to get into his safe."

Felix nodded, picking the dead body up as Demetri started for the stairs. "See you in a minute."

In a minute and a half, Felix was back at Demetri's side, up in Alistair's apartment.

"That took you long enough," said Demetri, shooting Felix a grin as he flipped open a metal box he found on a desk.

Scrunching his nose, he pulled a key attached to a rabbit's foot from the box. "Ghastly."

Felix absently knocked a painting from the wall, revealing a metal safe underneath. "Found it! Needs a key, though."

Demetri picked his way over, tossing the key at Felix. The safe was quickly opened to reveal lots of money, and even more sparkly jewelry.

"_Mi piace_," said Demetri, smirking.

"So shiny," said Felix.

"Get a bag."

In hardly any time, a duffel bag was filled with the money, jewels, and some other things.

"What's with the stuff we'd only get ten bucks out of?"

"We're making it look like he left, not like we killed him."

"I like having a smart friend."

"I know," replied Demetri, smirking and patting Felix's face. "Now let's go."

-HM-

"Well done, boys. Well done, indeed." Aro beamed at his best hit men. They really did so well.

"Now, then, time to bring in Sam Uley."

**Just a test run for a new AU sort of thing. Like it? Love it? Want some more of it? Reviews make the inspiration grow stronger, dearies! By the way, _'Mi piace'_ is basically 'Me Gusta' in Italian.**


	2. Chapter 2

**The boys are back! I was a bit sad at lack of reviews, but the one I did receive was quite nice, so props to her for that.**

Felix sat in the black Alfa Romeo, fidgeting to all hell. He didn't like just staring at the side of the Cullen Shipping Co. warehouse, looking for some sort of life. He wanted to punch someone's nose in and couldn't understand why Demetri was sitting so calmly in the driver's seat next to him.

"Why couldn't he just send Jane and Alec? Isn't this their thing?"

"They're busy. So are Heidi and Santiago, before you can ask."

Felix scrunched his nose. "Can we at least walk around or something?"

"Sure. But just because we haven't seen any security guards or cameras doesn't mean they aren't there, so be careful."

"I know, I know, I know!" said Felix impatiently, unfolding his large frame from the car.

Demetri followed suit, though much more gracefully. After a small bit of stretching, the two started walking around the perimeter. Other than Felix occasionally asking for food, it was quiet. Almost too quiet.

"No outside cameras..." mused Demetri. "Let's go in. And be quiet."

Felix rolled his eyes as Demetri fiddled with the lock. This Cullen place was weirding him out. They were meant to be on the look-out for the blond lady Cullen, Rose, because she wasn't really anywhere lately, but there was basically nobody here.

"Alright, after you," said Demetri as the door opened.

Felix grunted and walked in as quietly as his boots would allow. The place was almost silent, except for some humming from the few lights that were on in their florescent annoyance. But all the same, a few steps in, Demetri stopped, a deer in headlights.

"Someone's here..." he whispered, so quietly Felix almost couldn't hear.

"You sure?"

Demetri gave Felix his 'Don't Be Stupid, Of Course I Am' look. Felix put his hands up in silent surrender. After a moment, Demetri raised three fingers. Three other people were here.

"Security. Split up."

Felix was about to question why Demetri got to be the boss, but the smaller mobster was already gone. Felix made a face at where the shorter man had been before taking off to the left. Demetri always went to the right, for some reason. So the tall man started walking around boxes, thinking he was being quite ninja-like. Then someone grabbed his hair.

He gave a yelp, because he knew Demetri couldn't reach that high, then turned. He came to face two very tall, tan women with black hair.

"Hello, ladies," he greeted with a pathetic little half grin.

"SENNA!" the woman who didn't have a hold of his hair yelled to the warehouse. "Did you find the other one?"

"Yes!" an unseen woman called. This was followed by a large swarm of Italian cursing.

It didn't take long for the third woman to round the corner with Demetri in hand. Felix thought it hilarious that she was four inches taller than his friend.

"Laugh and die, Felix," Demetri warned. "Laugh and die."

The woman, Senna, gave Demetri a sharp smack upside the head. Demetri gave out a loud yell of pain, so Felix could tell it must have hurt.

"So I assume there won't be any sandwich-making in this relationship?"

"Kachiri, what will we do with these two?" asked the woman who didn't have a hold on anyone, but was glaring evilly at Felix for his sandwich remark.

"Well, we don't know who they are yet, Zafrina," said the one who still had a grip on his hair.

"We work here!" said Felix.

Kachiri gave Felix's hair a sharp tug. "That was a pathetic lie."

"I know."

Demetri rolled his eyes, gaze resting on the long-fingered hand that held onto his arm.

"You have quite the grip, there," Demetri told Senna.

"Thank you," she answered sarcastically.

"Not quite strong enough, though."

Before Senna could process what was happening, Demetri managed a standing back flip, wrenching the hand from his arm. Quickly, he scaled some boxes, now standing above the others.

"Felix, move to the right a bit."

As soon as the large man did so, Demetri leaped from the boxes and two women who were right behind him and slammed into Kachiri. She fell, but Felix knew he was missing some hair.

"Wanna run away now?" asked Felix.

"Oh yes, let's," Demetri answered, kicking at Kachiri's reaching hand.

The two dashed off, the tan women just behind. Felix took out his gun, earning a questioning look from his partner. He then proceeded to shoot out all the lights, knowing that he and Demetri would still be able to see. They had developed some sort of night vision over the years.

"Where'd they go?" Zafrina asked.

"I can't see anything!" said Senna.

"Spread out!" commanded Kachiri, starting in the direction the boys had been going.

Of course, Felix and Demetri were climbing over random shipping boxes towards the exit. They sat still, like a pair of gargoyles, as one of the women passed before climbing down and leaving. They both knew not to mess with those three unless you were prepared. They decided that they definitely would be tomorrow night as they drove off in their Alfa Romeo.

"My scalp hurts."

"Oh, shut up."

**End of chapter. Cookies to all. Not really, though, I enjoy my chocolate chips. I'll give you one if you review though. I promise.**


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